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Decap
Decap is an alcoholic beverage. It is made from bone marrow and is known for being very easy to get drunk off of. It also comes in various flavors and has a long-lasting culture around its production and critique. Source Decap is made from human bone marrow. In order to make it, you must extract the marrow without it coming into contact with air at any time. You put it into an antigravity vacuum chamber and mix in flavorings such as fruit or spices, depending on how you want the final product to taste. After that you must give it access to constant direct sunlight in order for it to ferment properly. After it has fermented for between fifty and ten thousand years, you have to freeze the marrow to within 1 Kelvin of absolute zero in under two seconds. Then you may remove it from the vacuum chamber and submerge it in boiling liquid until it melts into the liquid completely. Water or milk is most often used, but other liquids can be used to achieve different tastes. History Origins Decap was originally discovered by a Spice farmer in the early days of the republic when he found a strange fluid in a shipwreck where every single crewmember had been decapitated. He decided to try and poison his boss with it. He wound up sleeping with his boss instead. After that night he spent his entire life figuring out how the strange substance had formed in that shipwreck. Eventually he discovered through microscopic analysis that the mystery liquid was made from the bone marrow of the decapitated crewmembers. He then worked out the specific circumstances on the ship that had fermented the crewmembers' marrow into the liquid he had encountered. He spent his last few years developing a machine that would replicate the right conditions for fermentation. He passed this information, as well as his invention, down to his children. They made the very first batch of Decap from his own marrow. They also managed to buy some marrow from the families of the deceased. After several decades of fermentation, the first Decap brewery was born. Rising Popularity It was a thousand years later or so when the first Decap critics started to appear. A few centuries after that, one critic invented the flavor reference system that continued to be used for many thousands of years to come. At some point in the centuries leading up to the Decap Wars, a very wealthy merchant became the first man ever to drink a glass of Decap made from his own marrow. The marrow was extracted on his 21st birthday and fermented for only 50 years. The man claimed that it was the greatest thing he had ever tasted. The Decap Wars During the Decap Wars, the breweries started to clone people in order to harvest the clones as soon as they reached adulthood. The clones found out why they had been created and rebelled. The clones won in the end, but the breweries still earned a profit off the war due to the massive casualties that they were able to extract product from afterward. In the wake of the war, the republic passed a law stating that marrow had to be given willingly in order for it to be extracted. This did not prevent the practice of pirating, however. Breweries continued to gain many hundreds of gallons more marrow per year than they could ever afford to purchase legitimately. Effects Decap is known for being able to intoxicate more efficiantly than most other drinks in the galaxy. Its alcohol content is exceedingly high, in excess of 180 proof. This makes it a top choice at some parties due to it being very easy to get drunk off of. However, it is also known for being very difficult to get sick from. The unique blend of calcium and carbon seems to act as a kind of stablizing agent for the digestive system, preventing the feeling of sickness caused by most beverages of its kind. It also acts as a stimulant, instead of a depressant like most drinks. This means that the drinker is much less likely to pass out. In general, people under the influence of Decap stay much more functional than those drinking lesser amounts of most other forms of alcohol. Appearance Decap can vary in color drastically depending on the ingredients used during the production. In general the warm spectrum of colors is more sweet and results from the use of fruit and water. The cool spectrum is more subtly flavorful and results from the use of spices and milk. In general all that the age of the Decap affects is the consistency and alcoholic content. Decap variations are often refered to by a hex color code followed by an age in half-centuries, for example, "FAF319 - 75" would be a mostly yellow Decap that had been aged for 3750 years. Every bottle of Decap has the words "Don't lose your head. Drink responsibly." printed on the side. The logo of the Decap company is a minimalist figure of a man with no head holding a bottle in one hand and a hat in the other. Contributions Thanks go to GorseTAurn for the conversation that inspired the creation of Decap. Category:Fanon Category:Not Alexander's Pile O' Crud Category:Beverages Category:Featured